I Saw Three Ships Come Sailing In . . .

on Christmas Day, on Christmas Day . . .
'twas a good, quiet Christmas . . . . despite the fact that I was sans the Christmas spirit, and I almost broke down crying during Christmas Eve dinner. But that is neither here nor there.

The here and there is that I am tipsy at 11pm on a Friday night, having slogged down 2 juice glasses full of Australian chardonnay. The boys are playing Mario Kart and I am surfing the blogs. I must confess, I like this feeling of creativity that accompanies the mild inebriation. I wonder if this is where Hemingway went wrong? (No, close your mouth, I would hardly dare compare myself with the old man.) And I love when I stumble upon someone who shares my views of the world. Case in point, an excerpt from The Smitten:
"DHL. Oh boy, where do I start? I think I’ll compile a list of the lies you have told us in the past week! 1. We made a first delivery attempt on Wednesday. [No missed package notice.] 2. We made a second delivery attempt on Thursday. [Ibid.] 3. We made a final delivery attempt on Friday. [Lies! I WAS HOME ALL DAY!] 4. We will hold your package for you at the loading dock. [You did not.] 5. You will be able to pick up your package at the loading dock. [No, we were not able.] 6. We can’t find it. [No, you didn’t look.] 7. But will call you when do. [Also not true.] 8. We never said we’d call you. [Ibid.] 9. This isn’t our fault because you see you called Customer Service and not the loading station and even though they told you the package would be held, they are not able to say that with any guarantee. [Wait, what?] 10. We’re sorry for the inconvenience, despite our sneering, arrogant tone. [Oh wait, you never said that.] Hey thanks DHL, our sisters really enjoyed the elegantly wrapped boxes of AIR we gave them for Hanukah."
My own 3 months of dealing with this devil-spawn company has left me bitter. It's along the same lines as when you are having with a conversation with someone about oh, say, the shape of a bridge, and they rudely insist that it is one way and you know in your head that it is not that way but this way, but you don't really have the proof to back up your argument, so you keep quiet, and then for months and months later every time you cross that bridge you think to yourself, see, dammit, it's like this not like that!

"I Like the Wizard of Oz. I like the Tin Man."
I did not, I repeat did not, watch all 24 hours of A Christmas Story on TNT. Not even 2 hours' worth. Not that I think any less of the classic, but I just wasn't into it. (See above re: lack of spirit.)


I spent 12.5 hours at work today. Now before that seems like a huge accomplishment, let me clarify that I had the 26th off, I called in "personal issue" yesterday, and I had already requested tomorrow and Friday off for vacation days. And by vacation, I mean spending quality time in a DIY log cabin that separates me from the snow. So when my work week consists of just 12.5 hours, I have nothing to "waa" about.

Less than an hour ago I pulled out a reference to The Cutting Edge . . . Where have you gone D. B. Sweeney? A nation of gen X women turn their lonely eyes to you . . .